Date Me

Me:
Hi, my name's Evil David.

I love long walks in the mountains and short walks on the beach.
I like medium length walks in fields of grain but medium short to medium-long walks among tuberous crops like potatoes or beets and sometimes carrots.
I prefer sprints in bear-infested forests and jaunty jogs around haunted graveyards.

Religion: Does not believe in karma.

Three adjectives that best describe me: Dastardly, incorrigible, kraven

You:
Either be evil, or open to being evil.
Must be open to facial hair.
Willing to sign over their soul to me.
"Innocent souls" need not apply.